We’re at a laugh more than cry moment in the Trump Regime. South Park. Diaper Diplomacy. “There’s a minute missing on all the tapes.” But, no, there’s no minute missing in the actual tape, just the edited one the Attorney Effing General put out.
The files were created by Biden or Clinton, but Clinton’s definitely on the list. Donald Fartsalot is not on the list, but if he is, Biden put him there. But Biden didn’t release the list because…Hell nobody knows. The whole thing is a hoax anyway. Somehow they managed to imprison Ghislaine Maxwell though. (And can’t we all please just agree on a pronunciation of that child sexual predator’s first name?)
And the windmills! The windmills are the worst kind of energy. The whales! My god think of the whales. Anyway, “Don’t talk about that, talk about these other people over there.” I mean, can you get any more “Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain” than that?
So, in truth, we should have made popcorn. And I’m sure popcorn is available somewhere in Sea World. But popcorn isn’t one of the options during the Seven Seas Food Festival. At least, if it is, we didn’t pick it because…it’s just popcorn.
This week, we made Chocolate Temptation Cupcakes.
According to the festival, “This decadent cupcake features a chocolate base, topped with chocolate fudge icing, chocolate whipped cream, and a chocolate hard shell.”
We decided not to try to make the hard shell and went with Hershey’s Shell Topping from the grocery. I bought three bottles (they’re not very big) thinking I’d need a lot.
But here’s the thing. To get the hard shell to get hard, what you put it on has to be frozen. We tried putting it on right after the cupcakes were ready. No go. We refrigerated them for 30 minutes. Nope. Then we put a couple in the freezer for 30 minutes. Still no.
Here’s our final product.
And I cut it open, so you could see the filling!
These cupcakes were super delicious! We left the others without the shell topping and they didn’t need it. The only problem for me was the cupcake-to-filling ratio. Too much icing. If I made them again, I guess I’d put the icing on top and then add the whipped topping. Just like the description says.
Chocolate always makes things better. And we had icing left over so I made brownies a few days later and iced them. OMG. Best brownies ever!
All that screaming about family values! And that so-called pervert Bill Clinton! Those Democrats are eating children, my god! And running a child sex ring out of a pizza parlor! They were so determined to get to the bottom of the whole Jeffrey Epstein debacle because they knew–the just knew!–that Clinton and other rich Democrats were on his list!
Release the Epstein files! Release the files so we can jail Clinton! And probably Biden and Hunter and Hillary too! Family Values! Protect the Children!
What a bunch of bullshit. Just like they were never really about fiscal responsibility, or free trade, or letting businesses run themselves, or state’s rights, or draining swamps, they were never, ever really about family values, the rule of law, or jailing child predators.
They don’t give a tiny mushroom dick about child sex trafficking. And they don’t care if we know it. That Mike Johnson has got some balls on him, putting the house on vacation early so they don’t have to vote on releasing the files. Big balls. Like…maybe, boudin balls! Crispy fried boudin balls!
These are Sea World’s Seven Seas Food Festival Boudin Balls
Supposedly, you pronounce it boo-dahn balls. Where the n is barely there. But I like to say Boh-deen balls. Like Jethro Bodine. Because the current authoritarian regime trying to authori-tate reminds me of Jethro Bodine, but without the sweetness and empathy.
We used this recipe from the kitchn for our balls. But we halved it and made thirteen. It was so complicated. We mixed up all the stuff and left it in the fridge overnight. I was surprised that it all held together in ball form for the fryer, but it did. We decided not to make our own remoulade sauce and just bought a bottle of it at the grocery.
Our boudin balls
We both thought they were really good. If we’d actually been at the food festival, we think these would have been the best thing we’d have. There are chicken livers in these balls and that’s what I tasted most. My family is from North Carolina, so I’m pretty Southern and I love fried chicken livers.
We had a bunch left over so the next day, I decided to fry those up. Instead of using the deep fryer, as we did for the balls, I just used a pot. As I was flipping them, there was a loud pop and a burst of oil! I’m lucky it didn’t hit my neck and face, but it did get on my right hand. I was really worried for a while as I treated the burn and munched on fried chicken livers. But, while I do have some blistering on my thumb, it’s looking like I survived unscathed.
As much as this recipe is a lot of work, if you’re up for it, I’d recommend it. But be very careful if you’re going to fry up some leftover livers.
“Wait a minute. Are you people still talking about Epstein? Epstein?! That creep? With all the stuff going on right now? I made America GREAT again! And the floods, have you seen those floods? Nobody’s seen anything like it! How dare you bring up something so vile as Jeffrey Epstein?! Why, it’s disrespectful not to concentrate on IMPORTANT things right now! By the way, have you seen these moldings? Those had to be gold-leafed because you can’t find paint that looks like real gold. And you know how much I like gold. I’d slather my body in it if I could. Melania says she’d divorce me if I did that, but I don’t know. What do you think? You tell me.”
MAGA is so butt-hurt right now because Dear Leader won’t release the files. Or there are no files. Or there are files, but Obama wrote them.
If it weren’t so horrifying that this putrid sack of pus is running our country, it’d be hilarious.
What can you do? I mean, really. What can you do? You could eat. And that’s what we’re doing over here. While waiting for football season to start, we’re baking our way through what would have been our list of samples had we gone to Sea World’s Seven Seas Food Festival.
First up, we made Bananas Foster Beignets. From what I can find on the Tubes, we made the wrong ones. We used this recipe for the beignets. They don’t require yeast and are dropped into oil coming out looking like weird sea creatures. Typical beignets are rectangular. But I was lazy. I shouldn’t have been lazy.
I should note that this picture doesn’t adequately reflect our beignets. The ones here were raw in the middle. So the rest of the beignets were fried until they were really dark brown. Seriously. Really, really dark.
Maybe that’s why they were dense and rubbery. But that’s better than raw. And they were tasty! The Bananas Foster (I’m thinking that’s named after someone so I capitalized it) sauce from this recipe was lovely. I would have eaten more, but the texture was a bit off-putting. And both the recipes I looked at pointed out that this stuff should be eaten right away, so we didn’t bother saving any for later.
Then we made a cherry pound cake so that we could use up the leftover cherries from the pineapple upside down cake.
We used this recipe from All Recipes. I don’t know why I’m linking to it. You don’t want to make it. It was not good. Very dry. Really, really dry. But the icing was great. We left out the cherries and coconut (in the icing) though.
I have a great recipe from my great grandfather that is delicious. The only two differences I can find are that 1. Pa’s cake uses only 1/2 c Crisco and 1 stick of butter where All Recipes uses no butter and 1 1/2 c Crisco. And 2. Pa’s cooks at 325 instead of 350. The temperature could be the problem.
Anyway, hubs and I each managed to pick at two pieces, one after it was made and the second on the day after, and then threw it away.
Now, back to the Seven Seas Festival list, we made fish and chips! What a mess! What a gloriously fun mess!
We went with this recipe for “classic” fish and chips. We were hoping to replicate what you’d get in London. I think the fish turned out right, but our fries were a bit overdone. It was that last bit of broiling in the oven just before serving. I think it was too long. But they were still good.
Yes, it was all a bit bland. But that’s classic, I think. The fish tasted like fish–we went with cod. The battered coating was tasty, if not spicy. And the fried potato slices tasted like…potato.
All in all: YUM!
We used our deep fryer from T-Fal. We don’t get to do that very often. So we had a lot of fun. Makes me want to fry some more stuff.
Well, try the fish and chips (you don’t have to use a deep fryer). And if you want to try beignets, use this recipe and let me know how it turns out.
Well, everything in the country feels upside down, inside out, and whackadoodle crazy, so let’s get drunk and make Pineapple Upside Down Cake, eh?
The Orange dirt bag got into a fake pissing war with the Ayatollah and the most terrible thing about it is that I can’t believe either one of them. I don’t believe Iran’s nuke capabilities have been “obliterated,” and I don’t believe they weren’t. I believe that both Trump and Iran knew exactly what the other was doing and that’s why Iran’s nuke stuff was no doubt trucked away before the bombing. And Trump knew all about Iran’s little piss poor attack on our base in Qatar.
You can’t believe anything out of the Trump administration. Not. One. Thing. And you certainly can’t believe anything out of Iran, or even Israel these days. You can’t believe anything at all so just relax, have a rum, and bake something.
First, I missed last week. We made Lobster Mac n Cheese. The one at Sea World’s Seven Seas Food Festival would have been served to us in a waffle cone. We decided that was silly, so we 86’d that. (Very much like we’d like to 86 Trump!)
We used this recipe from Spend with Pennies and chose to use Gruyere for our third cheese, along with the cheddar and parmesan. The recipe says it’s “extra creamy” and well, it is, to its detriment.
On the plus side, you might be surprised, but yes, half a pound of lobster meat is plenty for 16 ounces of noodles. We didn’t hold any back to put on the top, though. We wanted it all mixed in. The dish was rich and full of lobster flavor.
But on the negative side, there wasn’t any other flavor but cream. This was more like Lobster Mac n Cream. When I had some leftover, I added more cheddar cheese and some garlic salt and it was delicious! So, if I ever make this again, I’ll use cheddar and parmesan only.
Give it a try!
So, this weekend (I’m writing this on Sunday), we made the Pineapple Rum Upside Down Cake. We couldn’t be sure if Sea World used Pineapple rum, or if it was just regular rum. Since we already had some Bacardi dark rum from the rum cake, we just used that.
We modified this recipe from Creative Culinary, mostly in that we didn’t want to use our cast iron skillet. Too heavy, and too much work just getting it down from the cabinet. We’ve always had pineapple upside down cake in pans. So that’s what we used: a 13×9″ cake pan.
The other thing we changed was the pecans. Pecans are listed in the ingredients for the topping, but never mentioned again. Presumably, we were supposed to put them amongst the pineapple rings somehow. 6 pecans. I bought a bag of pecans…for six. And when it never said what exactly to do with them, and never using them in pineapple upside down cake before, we decided to just ignore them. (I’ll nibble on them as a healthy snack.)
I’d also like to note that pecans aren’t included on any of the pictures on the recipe page.
What were we supposed to do with them?
Anyway, the cake came out just like the picture. Dense. Very dense. It was sweet. I thought too sweet, hubs thought just right. But the cake part was not palatable.
So, I don’t recommend that particular recipe. I’m pretty sure I used to use the one in the Better Homes & Gardens New Cookbook Tenth Edition from August 1989! Nom nom.
Well, another week ahead in Fascist USA. I wish you all luck. I suggest chocolate every day. It helps.
Well, our Feckless Fart-Filled Fascist President had a no good, very bad, terrible, squeaky parade last Saturday. Then he made a complete ass of himself at the G7 Summit. So, naturally, to make himself feel strong and powerful again, he’s going to start World War 3.
MAGA has gone full Real Housewives lately. I mean, what the hell, Pus Twat Tucker Carlson was having none of Creepy Psycho Face Ted Cruz in a recent interview. It’s like, the children are screaming, the children are screaming, and Farter Fuhrer is figuring maybe he’s just going to do all the work himself.
It’s not like the ass hat listens to anyone who disagrees with him, anyway.
So, in celebration of Donald Asshole Trump being an enormous fat chicken (and because it was next on our list) we made Chicken Tikka Masala.
We’d like to think that our CTM is the same as what they served at the Sea World Seven Seas Food Festival which we avoided by making all of these things at home. But who knows?
I have to say, I didn’t think I was going to like this. I chose it not realizing it qualified as a “curry.” I’m not sure anybody really knows what a curry is. It seems like it’s any dish that has a few spices that someone has deemed “curry-ish.” Nowhere in the name “tikka masala” is curry hinted at.
The point being that I have tasted a curry dish at some food festival or other and I did not like it.
But, if chicken tikka masala is curry, then call me a curry lover. This dish was our best yet. And I was pleasantly surprised to find that garam masala was easy to find in the spice section of Publix.
The only things we did differently from the recipe were that we used regular old rice, not basmati. And we only had smoked paprika, so despite the recipe saying not to use that in the curry sauce, we did.
Is that why it tasted so good? Maybe.
And the naan bread was yummy–also readily available at Publix. I love that our local stores are so diverse, don’t you?
Do you remember that episode of The Andy Griffith Show where Andy ended up at several people’s houses for dinner because of Goober’s mistake and they all served spaghetti? Remember how they talked about oregano as if it were some strange foreign spice?
That’s what I was like looking for garam masala and naan.
So, would I eat this again? Well…sure. If I happen to find myself in a restaurant and chicken tikka masala sounds like the best option, I’ll go for it. But it was complicated to make so the chances of me going through all of that trouble again are slim.
But don’t let that stop you. Give it a try. It’ll take your mind of the downfall of our democracy for a while.
Well, this week the United States hit the downward slope towards fascism. And I’d like to explain something to people who think that Trump supporters, the Fox News bimbos, the Mar-a-Lago Stepford Wives, etc. want fascism. It’s not that they want fascism. They don’t know what fascism is. What they want is to feel powerful and important. And they’re sick people who feel powerful and important when they can hurt other people.
MAGAts get off on chaos and violence.
Let me make this perfectly clear: ALL people of good conscience and empathy, kindness and courage, and of strong moral fabric have already turned away from Trump and this new American Fascist Party.
Anyone who still stands with what is happening here is vile and beyond reach. So stop trying to explain fascism to them. They don’t care. They’re giddy right now.
Sure, when this is all over, they’ll pretend they were never part of it, never supported it, or more likely, they’ll just crawl back under their rocks and not say anything.
This Saturday our country will suffer through Trump’s Ego Parade. Our humiliation will be complete. I don’t know where we go from here. I don’t know what’s going to happen or how we’ll get out of this, or when.
But I do know this: Donald Trump, at his core, is nothing but a Strawberry Pouffe.
This week, our pick from the Sea World Seven Seas Food Festival offerings was, as you’ve guessed, the Strawberry Pouffe. I’m going to say right up front that we didn’t actually have anything like what Sea World was offering.
Here’s a picture of what they had:
So, that looks like a biscuit with some strawberries and blackberries in it, drizzled with something creamy, and with a dollop of whipped cream on top.
That’s not what we made. This is what we made:
The only recipe I could find that sounded good was on Tik Tok and it went something like this:
Frozen puff pastry, sliced into rectangles Brush egg wash on top: 1 egg mixed with 1 tsp milk Bake at 350 for 8 to 10 minutes (hah!) Let cool slightly (whatever that means) Slice in half lengthwise
1 cup whipping cream Add 1/4 cup powdered sugar Whisk to stiff peaks
Spread strawberry jam on one side of puff pastry Pipe whipped cream on top Layer with slices of fresh strawberry Put top of pastry on and sprinkle with powdered sugar
Clearly we added another layer of whipped topping. We did it because we only made two pouffes and had a LOT of whipped cream. And it took a good 15-20 minutes to cook the puff pastry.
So, the strawberry pouffe was mildly sweet, messy to eat, and not worth all the trouble. I’m not saying I’d never eat it again. I mean, if I had a freshly cooked puff pastry, some already sliced up strawberries and some of that whipped topping you spray from a can, sure I might slap one together for breakfast or brunch. …maybe.
Well, that was the strawberry pouffe. All fluff, no substance, very little taste, and it poops itself when under pressure. Just like that piece of shit Donald Trump.
You know that flag with the coiled snake that says “Don’t Tread on Me,” right? Well, that’s called the Gadsden Flag. Christopher Gadsden, a member of the Continental Congress, designed the flag in 1775 during the American Revolution. The flag, at that time, represented true freedom. Freedom from tyranny. Specifically the tyranny of Great Britain. The flag flew on the masts of some of our ships during the war. And for many years, the Gadsden Flag was a symbol of the Revolution.
But, did you know that all of that changed when the Southern States started using the flag during our Civil War? The Union felt that the South had “tainted” the flag. In response, they created their own banners showing snakes being stomped on or torn apart by eagles. And, being the whiny, titty babies they were, the Confederate States of America decided to adopt a different flag so they wouldn’t get their feelings hurt anymore.
Thus, the Southern Cross.
The flag that says “When Fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.”
So, how do you suppose the South “tainted” the “Don’t Tread on Me” flag? Simple. For them, and for everyone who flies that stupid flag now, it means: Don’t Tread on Me, But Let Me Tread on Anyone I Want.
And, speaking of the Revolutionary War…Boston Cream Pie!
First of all, Boston Cream Pie is a cake. Not a pie. Apparently, back in the day, the words were used interchangeably because cakes and pies were baked in the same tins or some-such. Anyway, as you may know, it’s a cake with a layer of custard in the middle and topped with chocolate.
Most people say it was created by a chef in the Parker House Hotel in Boston. And I’ve read that the Boston Cream Doughnut was the official doughnut of Massachusetts* and that it came before the pie/cake. But I think Wikipedia says the pie/cake came first.
I prefer the doughnut, honestly.
But, enter the Boston Cream Cheesecake! The next item on our Sea World Seven Seas Food Festival list.
I have no recollection of making a cheesecake ever in my life. But I had a spring-form pan and I think maybe I have made one. But as far as I can remember, this was my first. And it was definitely my first time piping ganache! It was going really well, at first, and hubs was trying to turn the cake for me, when all of the sudden, a huge glop of ganache pooped out the top of the bag and landed all over my hand. Some of it oozed off, slid down the cabinets, and hit the floor.
Told you it was fun.
Anyway, here it is:
And here’s the slice I managed to get:
Okay, so, this was the best thing we’ve made yet. It was sweet and cheesy and a bit chocolate-y and so filling! I couldn’t finish my piece.
It has only one layer of cake and it was a bit wet. We did the aluminum foil around the pan thing for the water bath, but I think water still got in. And after a day or so, the cake texture was off from being in the fridge. I could have done without it.
Still, I’m proud of us. We made custard from scratch and ganache and the chocolate filling stuff. And it was soooo tasty!
I’m definitely going to make cheesecake again.
*You have no idea how many times I had to spell that to get it right.
So, there’s this old woman who lives in my neighborhood on the main road. People use this road as a thru-way from one big road to another, sometimes. Anyway, from the time the Orange Turd rode down the elevator in 2015…16, whenever…she was all in with the cult. Her yard had a huge Trump flag with the American flag. And she also had a Catholic flag on the pole for a while. She had a string of pennant flags that, though they were small, appeared to be Trump related, hanging from her eaves, Trump, Trump, Trump. And signs in her yard: Trump/Pence and then Trump/Vance.
The woman is nuts.
One time during Trump’s first term, I drove by her house and, as I often noticed, her flags were a disgrace. Hubs slowed the car so I could snap a picture.
She must have noticed because the next day, new flags were up. She must have had them ready to go but was too lazy to change them out until she saw someone noticed. But this picture, for me, epitomizes our country under the Trump regime. A complete disaster.
Well, he got elected again because of stupid, racist, cretins like her. But after about a month in office this year, things in her yard started to change.
First, the Trump flag came down and a new one never went back up. Then the yard signs disappeared. And now the flag banners are gone.
What happened old lady? Did Trump do something to make you change your mind? All the shit he’d done up to that point was okay with you? But now, suddenly, he’s hurt something or someone YOU love.
Fuck you, lady.
So, this week we made Lobster Roll from the Sea World Seven Seas Food Festival list. I figured I would really like this one. I’ve had lobster roll before and after tasting this one, I think some of them were actually made with real lobster.
We looked in our local grocery stores for lobster and didn’t find any so we googled and found this fresh seafood market uptown. We drove through a huge rainstorm into some sunshine to find ourselves in an unfamiliar part of town. It was a bit…industrial.
But we found the shop and almost went in the wrong door. One of the employees called out to us to go around front. If we went in that door, he said, they’d put us to work. So, we managed to find the entrance and walked in to a crowded, fishy-smelling (in a good way) shop and wandered toward the back where there seemed to be a counter. We had no idea what to do.
A guy asked me what I wanted and I told him: a pound of lobster meat. He asked if I wanted tail included and I, the princess, said yes, knowing full well that would make it more expensive. Because why else would he have asked, right?
He took my name and we were left to explore all the cool stuff they had for sale. Sauces, dips, seasonings, and drinks. They had an enormous white board on one wall with every kind of fish possible on it. At one point they apparently ran out of hogfish and a dude had to run out and erase the hogfish or something. I didn’t notice exactly what he did because my name was called.
We paid $51 for a pound of frozen lobster meat! Well, they did give us a lemon, too.
It was so expensive that we decided to thaw only half of it and make two sandwiches instead of four. So this weekend, I’m going to thaw the rest and pour garlic-y melted butter on it and just eat it!
We used this recipe for our lobster rolls. We halved everything, of course. And we used regular hot dog buns that we buttered and broiled first. We made a mistake because of the way steps 2 and 3 were written. I had read the entire recipe the day before so I have no excuse, but instead of adding the ingredients into a bowl and mixing before putting in the lobster, we started dumping them right onto the lobster.
Luckily we figured it out and did our best to take the lobster out and continue the right way. When we’d finished mixing it all together, though, it just looked dry. So added a bit more mayo.
In the end, it was delicious.
Lobster is really rich, though. It made me just a touch sick to my stomach. That half pound probably could have made four sandwiches. That, and the cost of the lobster, make this something I wouldn’t make often…or maybe ever again. But this one was a winner.
It’s been a long while since I posted on this blog. There are a couple of reasons for that.
Fascism.
People really don’t read blogs anymore, do they?
If you want to get right to the food, scroll down a bit. Otherwise, let’s get into it.
The first time the Orange Shitler won the Presidency I fell into a really deep depression. It got worse and worse until I sought help. And the help really did help. I remember posting on Facebook before the election that if this country elected that narcissistic buffoon, I would never forgive it. And I haven’t. It was disgusting finding out how many people I knew turned out to be horrible and/or stupid. Those relationships are over. Done. And no, I didn’t end relationships over politics. I ended them over moral values. They lack them. I have them.
To be honest, the depression wasn’t just about Mushroom Dick. I have a whole lifetime of reasons for therapy. (See: As My Mother Lay Dying and I am Not a Monster)
But you might think I’m going to say that this last time Cheeto Mussolini was elected I got so depressed I stopped blogging. But that’s not the way it happened. I stopped blogging mostly because of #2. Why bother?
I was going to blog last November after we went to the Epcot Food & Wine Festival. I took pictures of all the food and noted our thoughts about each sample. I mean, there was one booth where we got a lobster tail that was so dry and tough I thought they should have been ashamed to serve it. But I just didn’t feel like blogging.
And when that Trump Turd won again, you know what I did? I laughed. I just laughed and laughed. It was kind of a “are you fucking kidding me?” laugh. And I’m still laughing.
I hope every idiot who voted for that creep suffers. I hope they lose their health care, their jobs, their homes. I hope they lose everything. Fuck them.
But other than that, I’ve been doing just fine. I stopped writing for a while, though. I’m just tired of putting stuff out there to crickets. I got into reselling with a booth at an antiques mall. It’s a lot of fun. I get to shop all week and sell stuff.
But mostly, I’ve been making junk journals. Here’s a video of one of my latest:
I sell these journals at my booth.
Anyway, this spring, we would have gone to Sea World for the Seven Seas Food Festival. But we just don’t feel like spending all the money to force feed ourselves for a day. So, we decided to go to the website, choose all the samples we would have liked to try, and then make them here at home! Great idea, right? So, each Sunday, we make something we’ve never had before.
And just like I would have done if we went, I’m going to blog about what we ate. Except that, it won’t be in one big blog. Today, I’m going to show you the first seven things we made.
Here we go…
First, Garlic Toast Chicken Parmesan
We looked at a couple of recipes for this. One would have us hollow out a few wide slices of Italian bread and stuff chicken parmesan into it or something ridiculous like that. We decided to just make chicken parmesan sandwiches on garlic toasted rolls.
Looks fabulous, doesn’t it?
I’m pretty sure we used this recipe for the chicken, but substituted Italian style bread crumbs.
Well, it was bland. Seriously. All that spice in the bread crumbs and the sauce. And the garlic-y toasted roll. Bland. Well, actually, the roll was pretty good.
Next up…Pork Pincho. This is a Puerto Rican recipe for pork chunks on a stick. It was quite involved. We made a marinade and soaked the pork in it overnight. Then stuck the chunks on a stick and grilled them, brushing them with bbq sauce.
I had to find stuff like sofrito and sazon and adobo seasoning. I searched all over the place for the sofrito. Once I found it in the freezer section of Walmart I now see it in every store. Once you know where to look…
It smelled good. But alas, it was as bland as the chicken. And we weren’t sure why we had to stick a piece of bread on the stick, but we did. And again, the bread was the best part.
It’s not the Puerto Rican’s fault. Pork is just not that flavorful.
Anyway, then we chose Cardamom Chocolate Torte Cake.
I have to say, I don’t know why people want to ruin chocolate by adding stuff like coffee…or cardamom.
Looks a lot better this way. So…the texture was like dense pudding. It was chocolatey. But it was also cardamommy. And again…why? Also, a lot of work when a pan of brownies would do much better. And you know what? You can pour ganache on brownies, too.
Then we made some Jamaican Jerk Chicken. Once again, using this recipe, we were hunting odd ingredients and creating a marinade. We found Scotch Bonnet Peppers at a little independent grocery nearby.
Here’s our chicken:
And here’s my plate. We added peas and mashed potatoes.
The peas and mashed potatoes were great! The chicken was spicy hot. It was more heat than flavor. We really don’t get it. Where is the flavor? How do we get flavor in chicken parmesan, pork pincho, and Jamaican Jerk chicken? What are we doing wrong?
But we persevere…
Next up, Palermo Fontina Cheese Meatball.
Oh. My. God. Look at this meatball!
We used this recipe. They’re huge! Here it is cut open…
Now, I don’t mean to harp on a message, but this was basically a big hunk of meat. It had some flavor, yes. But again, I thought the garlic bread was the best part. And I definitely couldn’t eat the whole thing. Who could? Who would?
Next we tried something we thought couldn’t lose. The Bleu Cheese Potato Twisters! I mean, it’s potatoes, right? You can’t ruin potatoes.
Well…
We decided to use bleu cheese salad dressing instead of fresh bleu cheese. We thought it would add more flavor. And we couldn’t really find a good recipe. So we just read a few different ones. Learned how to cut the potato on the skewer. And then just went with it.
This is how it ended:
It was…okay. But so much trouble for so little benefit. I would so much rather have a baked potato!
And last (for this episode) we made Rum Cake! We used this recipe which claims to be the best rum cake recipe. I got to go to the liquor store! I haven’t had rum in forever. I got some Bacardi Gold, as I couldn’t find the recommended brand.
The cake was easy enough to make. It tastes sweet and cinnamon-y with a glow of alcohol to it. I could really taste the rum in the glaze.
But, here’s the thing. It’s not chocolate. It’s a sweet cake. It’s for people who like sweet stuff more than they like chocolate. But, even if I wanted a different kind of cake, I’d go for my great grandfather’s “Pa’s Pound Cake” recipe. Or Bill Sherrill’s “Vanilla Wafer Cake” recipe. I wouldn’t make this again.
I know what you’re thinking. Don’t I like anything? And if I’m so particular, why do I try stuff?
Because it’s fun, that’s why. And it’s good for you to try stuff, even if you don’t like it in the end.
We’ve got plenty more to make on our list. And when we’re done with the Sea World Seven Seas stuff, we’re going to do the same with the Epcot Food & Wine Festival this year. I’ll blog all about it, even if nobody cares.
And in the meantime, let’s do our best to get through America’s Stupid Fascism Era with our empathy (as much as we had, anyway), morals, and joy intact.
I was skimming Jeff Tiedrich’s latest email, about Trump and his Bible sale, when I came across this quote from Christianity Today:
And therein lies the most alarming concern we share about this “American Bible.” It promotes the myth of an American exceptionalism that is founded on God blessing this nation in a way that God has not or does not blessed other nations.
There are two auxiliary verbs in there, not separated by commas, and that’s okay, except that what follows is totally screwed up. The auxiliary verbs in question are “has not” and “does not.” But they’re separated by the word “or.”
What the authors are trying to say is “…God has blessed other nations” and “…God does not bless” other nations.
“Has blessed” is past tense. “Does not bless” is present tense. You can’t just shove those two together and then use the past-tense “blessed” for the verb.
If you look around the internet, you’ll find that most people just use the verb form that relates to the subject, or in this case the auxiliary verb, that is closest to it. So, they’d say “Martha or her parents don’t want the pie, but I’m not sure which.” This could be grammatically correct. I’m still trying to figure it out. If you put that sentence into Pro Writing Aid, it says that’s just fine.
Or, they’d say, “Martha has not or does not eat spinach.” And everyone assumes this is just fine. Pro Writing Aid says it’s just fine.
But it’s just wrong. Wrong, I tell you!
And when you try that with our little wowzer of a sentence: “God has not or does not bless other nations”–Pro Writing Aid tells you to put a comma before and after “or does not” and then tells you “bless” is wrong.
So, it’s just wrong.
You can’t put two different tenses of an auxiliary verb together and then use only one tense of the verb. You can’t say “…God has not or does not bless other nations.” And you can’t say “…God has not or does not blessed other nations.”
You could separate the offending auxiliary verb with dashes: “…God has not–or does not–blessed other nations.” At least, Pro Writing Aid doesn’t flag it. But if you ask me, it’s still wrong.
The only way to fix it is to say: “It promotes the myth of an American exceptionalism that is founded on God blessing this nation in a way that God has not blessed, or does not bless, other nations.”
There! I fixed it for them.
I am not going to read all of their article. Based on this sample, I don’t think I could handle it.
